While falling through the black whole of social media (aka scrolling for an innumerable amount of time) I unintentionally fell into a deep sadness, followed by panic, and hopelessness, ultimately ending with anger and curiosity.
Leading to this world wind of emotions, I was overstimulated with black lives matter posts, news coverage of injustices, senseless killings and violence, racism, class-ism and all the other -isms and -schisms that exist to cause chaos and confusion.
I can’t help but to be triggered into thinking about how I experience life as a black woman, with a black son and a black daughter, with a black husband and so many other layers of my identity ( as they exist within systems of societal connections).
I can’t help but to be crossed with anxiety when thinking about how the world perceives my 6″2 standing, brown chocolate of a man, and how at any moment, he can seem to be a threat to anyone ignorant of his fun and loving nature. Or how do I frame the perspectives of life for my kids? Do I simply teach them faith as security in God with no extra emphasis on world issues? Do I indoctrinate my kids to become revolutionary activist, burning was passion to fight injustice and “stick it to the Man”? Do I help my kids to find a balance where they sprinkle a little of Jesus, backed by the activism and social work ethics of a person who leads with the heart of righteousness? Or would it be easier to teach my kids (and convenience myself for a matter of fact) to ignore the world around us, in hopes to find bliss in the mist of naivety?
I guess it depends on what day it is. A day to relax or a day to be on guard!
This shared trauma of the African American/ black experience is real. At one time or another, we all get triggered in this way by what we see in the world around us.
Whether therapy, conformity, faith, community, or burning passion to lead is the answer to this trauma response to life… find what comforts your soul.
Sigh.
All of this triggered by social media scrolling. LOL.
A partial tangential thought of a woman of color, as triggered by the world around her.
Feel overwhelmed about life and need to talk to someone?
Call 1-800-273-8255
Available 24 hours everyday
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Signed your Sister…….
Contesa
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