Tag Archives: Blog

Blog

Dear Diary: I Gave Myself Permission to Thrive

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For so long, I carried the weight of showing up, holding everything together, and making sure everyone else was okay.

I was surviving. But I wasn’t truly living.

And here’s the truth. Surviving is not the same as thriving. One keeps you breathing. The other makes you come alive.

Today, I want to share seven real reasons why you may not be thriving yet. Not to shame you, but to help you pause, reflect, and reclaim your joy.

Living for the Weekend

If your joy only shows up on Friday night and fades by Sunday evening, sis, that’s not thriving.

You deserve to feel fulfillment on Monday mornings too. Thriving means creating a rhythm of life that excites you every day, not just during your “escape days.” Joy is not meant to be temporary. It is meant to be experienced daily.

Feeling More Dread Than Excitement

When your stomach drops more than your spirit rises, that is your body and soul signaling that something is off.

Thriving women wake up with expectancy, not dread. It doesn’t mean life is perfect. It means there is a sense of purpose quietly fueling you.

Smiling While Secretly Empty

You’ve mastered the polished smile but inside you feel drained.

High capacity women often wear masks to keep everyone else comfortable. But thriving means your inner world matches your outer expression. You deserve to feel as good as you look, sis.

Thinking Joy Is Unrealistic

If joy feels like a luxury instead of a lifestyle, you’ve settled.

Thriving doesn’t mean being happy all the time. It means creating space for joy, laughter, and lightness as a part of your everyday life. Joy isn’t optional. It is oxygen for your soul.

Running on Autopilot

You move through your days by muscle memory.

Emails, errands, meetings, routines. No wonder you feel disconnected from yourself. Thriving requires intentionality. It requires pausing to live in the moment instead of rushing through it.

Calling Chaos Your Normal

Always overwhelmed, always behind, always juggling.

That is not your identity. It is burnout pretending to be normal. Thriving means operating from alignment. It means building a life where your schedule reflects your values and peace becomes your standard.

Surviving Instead of Flourishing

Surviving says “I made it through the day.”

Flourishing says “I lived today fully.”

Thriving means your life is about more than tasks and obligations. It is about growth, fulfillment, joy, and overflow. You were created for abundance, not survival mode.

Sis, You Were Made to Thrive

You don’t have to keep tolerating life. You were made to experience it fully, freely, and joyfully.

✨ Work with me 1:1 in life coaching

✨ Find alignment, joy, and balance

✨ Start living abundantly, not just surviving

Your thriving season starts now.

🌸 Follow @divinealignedcollective and @ContesaTateLive for daily encouragement, faith-filled guidance, and strategies to protect your capacity.

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High Capacity Women, Women Who Lead, Burnout Recovery, Joyful Motherhood, Black Women Healing, Women Empowerment, Self Care for Moms, Therapist Wellness, Counselor Community, Mindful Living, Permission to Rest, Faith and Healing, Leadership and Wellness, Balanced Living for Women, Strong Friends, Women Supporting Women, Flourishing Not Surviving, Life Coaching for Women

Blog

Dear Diary… I Embraced Being Alone

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There’s a certain power in choosing yourself.

Not out of bitterness, not out of fear… but out of a deep desire to reconnect with your own soul.

I didn’t embrace being alone because I was lonely.

I embraced it because I was learning to listen to me again.

The Power of Alone

Being alone isn’t loneliness, it’s liberation.

It’s choosing to honor your own company instead of waiting for others to validate your presence.

It’s a quiet strength that says:

“I am enough, even by myself.”

This kind of stillness doesn’t make you weak. It fortifies you. It builds a relationship with the woman in the mirror, the one who has always been there, even when the world grew silent.

The Power of Alone

Sometimes courage looks like showing up solo.

Going to that event. Starting that new journey. Saying yes to your dreams without needing a crowd to cheer you on.

Do it scared.

Do it alone.

But most importantly… do it.

Every step you take alone is still a step forward. And those quiet victories? They matter just as much as the loud ones.

Validate Your Own Voice

You don’t need a panel of approval to trust how you feel.

Give yourself permission to validate your own emotions, opinions, and boundaries.

Self-validation is self-respect in action. It’s looking at your truth and saying, “I trust me.”

Sis, your voice is worthy. Even when it’s the only one in the room.

Freedom in Authenticity

The more you embrace your true self, the freer you become.

You stop shrinking to fit. You start expanding to be.

Check in with yourself often. Ask:

“What do I need right now?”

Then listen. And honor the answer.

Authenticity isn’t just about being seen, it’s about being free.

Freedom in Authenticity

Freedom isn’t found in fitting in.

It’s found in being real.

Even if no one joins you.

Even if no one understands you.

Even if it’s quiet.

Choose joy, healing, and peace anyway.

This is your reminder:

Be free. Be brave. Be you.

A Sacred Reminder

You are allowed to take up space.

You are allowed to choose quiet.

You are allowed to enjoy your own company.

Being alone can be beautiful when you finally realize… you are worth the time.

💬 Comment below: What’s something you’ve learned to enjoy doing by yourself?

✨ Save this post as a reminder that solitude can be sacred.

🌸 Following @divinealignedcollective on Instagram and Facebook for life coaching and healing reflections for high-capacity women.

Also like and subscribe on YouTube for recorded sessions and meditation :

📺 The Divine & Aligned Collective

Blog

The best project I’ll ever work on .. is ME!

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I am in awe of my body. Every day of this weight loss and healthy living journey, I am witnessing what I once thought was impossible. It’s not just about the pounds I’ve lost or the clothes that now fit… it’s about the strength, discipline, and resilience that I’ve discovered within myself.

Not long ago, I was approaching 300 pounds. I was weighed down physically, but also emotionally and mentally, by habits and mindsets that didn’t serve me. Walking up a flight of stairs left my knees trembling. I wore 3X clothing and avoided mirrors because I didn’t recognize the woman staring back at me. My life revolved around everyone else’s needs, and I was at the bottom of my own priority list.

I went from a 3x to XL in clothing !!!!

But today, everything is different. I am proudly wearing XL clothing. I recently hit a major milestone in the gym, leg pressing 720 pounds…. an accomplishment that still amazes me. For the woman who once struggled to walk up the stairs, this is not just a physical victory, it’s a spiritual and emotional one.

This journey has not been perfect or easy. I’ve become very aware of the parts of me that are still healing. I’ve noticed how obsessive I can be with the scale, with tracking every habit, and with how hypersensitive I’ve become around food choices. In the past, I would have judged myself for these new “quirks,” but today, I welcome them. I welcome every new insecurity, every new obsession, and every raw emotion that surfaces because they are all part of the journey toward optimum health. They remind me that I am finally paying attention to me.

Progress pics!

The proof of my growth is in more than just my reflection. My triglycerides have dropped from 135 mg to 75 mg, and my A1C is now under 5. I am no longer at risk for conditions that once scared me into silence. I feel freedom in my body, in my mind, and in my spirit. I am so proud of myself and the woman I am becoming.

And this is just the beginning. I am excited and curious to see what else I can achieve. How much stronger can I get? How much healthier can I become? How much more joy can I create in this body that once felt like a burden but now feels like a gift?

To every woman reading this, I want to encourage you to choose you. Make the decision to put yourself first, even when life pulls you in a hundred directions. The version of you that is waiting on the other side of discipline, self-love, and consistency will change your entire life.

If this speaks to you, I invite you to join me in the Divine Aligned Collective, our private women’s life coaching group where we hold each other accountable, embrace self-discovery, and create more fulfilled, powerful lives together.

Click the link below to join the community and start aligning your health, mindset, and purpose today.

Or, if you are ready for personalized guidance, click to book a one-on-one life coaching session and start planning your personal growth journey with intentionality and clarity.

This is your reminder that you are worth the work, and your next level is waiting for you to say yes.

Follow👇🏾

Instagram : @ContesaTateLive

Instagram : @DivineAlignedCollective

From a 3xl to now I’m a XL in clothing size !
Blog

Normalize: Not Liking Someone Without Conflict

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Let’s talk about something we don’t discuss enough. It’s okay to not like someone and still have zero drama attached to it.

In a world that thrives on subtweets, unfollows, and messy group chats, we’ve been conditioned to believe that if you don’t vibe with someone, it automatically means there’s beef. But here’s the truth:

Not everyone is for you, and that’s okay.

Sometimes personalities just don’t click. Maybe the energy feels off, the conversation doesn’t flow, or you simply don’t enjoy being around them. It doesn’t make them a bad person, and it doesn’t make you one either. It just means you’re not each other’s people and that’s normal.

I’m taking this lesson to heart in my own life. I no longer overly obligate myself to enter spaces that I do not want to go into. I am intently choosing to be in the company of people I genuinely want to be around, and I do it without feeling bad about my standard. My peace and my energy matter more than forcing myself into circles that don’t align with me.

I’m no longer a people pleaser and enjoy walking to my own beat more and more as I practice my boundaries!

This is your reminder that:

You don’t owe anyone forced friendships. Boundaries don’t require explanations. Walking away doesn’t require a dramatic exit.

Peaceful disconnection is a form of self-care. No side-eyes, no gossip, no silent wars. Just quiet acceptance that your paths don’t align.

So, let’s normalize this:

“I don’t dislike you. I just don’t vibe with you and that’s perfectly fine.”

Your energy is too valuable to waste on forcing connections that don’t feel right. Protect your peace and let everyone exist where they belong without tension.

💬 Your Turn:

Have you ever quietly stepped back from someone without it being a big deal?

Share your thoughts in the comments.

I’d love to hear your perspective on protecting your peace without the drama.

Blog, business tips

Monetizing your skills isn’t hard in 2025!

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Let me go ahead and say it… monetizing your skills in 2025 is not hard. We are in a season where technology is literally doing half the work for us, and the only thing standing between you and extra income might just be you overthinking it.

We’ve got AI tools, done-for-you content templates, and payment processors that can be set up in minutes. You can create, market, and sell your offers right from your phone! Yes, even during nap time or on your lunch break.

Whether you’re a gifted encourager, a beauty guru, a problem solver, or someone who knows how to make life just a little bit easier for others, there’s space for you to show up and get paid.

Here’s Why It’s So Easy Now:

AI is doing the heavy lifting. Whether you need captions, email copy, or content ideas tools like ChatGPT are basically free assistants. Content creation is a breeze. Canva, Instagram, and other platforms make it simple to create beautiful posts, digital products, and videos without a tech background. Getting paid is instant. Stripe, PayPal, and Gumroad are plug-and-play. No hoops. No stress. Just drop your link and start collecting coins.

So if you’ve been waiting for the “right time” to launch, the time is now. You already have everything you need.

3 Simple Ways to Start Monetizing Your Skills:

1. Turn What You Know Into a Product

That skill or gift you overlook? Someone else needs it. Whether it’s a guide, a course, or a one-on-one session, put it in a format people can buy.

2. Start Creating Consistent Content

You don’t have to go viral to get paid. Just show up consistently. Give value. Talk to your people like you’re talking to your sister. That’s what builds connection and connection leads to conversions.

3. Make It Easy for People to Pay You

Don’t wait until it’s “perfect.” Set up a simple checkout link and start sharing it. Link it in your bio, your email, your text messages, or wherever your people are.

You’ve got something valuable to offer. The world needs it, and there’s no reason you can’t get paid for it. Let’s stop sitting on our gifts.

Want the step-by-step on how to start making money online?

Grab my Digital Dollars ebook and get and introduction to how to offer your skills and knowledge online!

Click here to get your copy now!

You were built for more and this is your season to show up and cash in on your calling.